Advocating For Your Child

Advocating for your child is one of the most important jobs you will have as a parent.  I was a teacher for many years before I took children into my home.  Because I knew a lot about the school system, it made it a lot easier to get exactly what my children needed in school.  Unfortunately not all parents have this inside information.  Here are some examples of things I had to advocate for:

**My boys both had a time when they tried really hard but did not pass their End of Grade Tests.  The school said Level 2s were automatically retested, but I did not feel it would be beneficial to my children.  We found out that it was not a requirement, and we could send a note saying we did not want them retested.  My younger son's school did not give us trouble, but we had to call the county before my older son's school accepted the note.

**My older son was way behind in school when he came to us.  To a teacher, he would look like a student who did not care at all.  Because we knew him best, we had the insight that he had missed a lot of school in the past and had very low self confidence.  He would work hard for teachers that had a relationship with him and really expected him to do well, but for other teachers he would not do much.  For a few years, we would send out e-mails at the beginning of the year to his teachers letting them know some background about him and what we expected of them.  For example, we wanted to be notified as soon as he started having trouble, because once report cards came, it was often too late to fix the problem.  Now that he has seen some success in school, he has a little more confidence, and we have only had to intervene in one class.

I realize that navigating the school system is hard, so please ask any questions you have.  My husband and I are both teachers and have a lot of experience in the school system.  He is also working on his Masters in Administration, so he has insight on that level also. 

There is another place where I have found that advocating is necessary, and that is the medical system.  My daughter has been having problems with fevers for awhile.  Her doctor has not been able to find anything wrong with her.  She was sent on to an immunologist who came up with a theory that she doesn't sweat.  It seemed to be a good theory because when we would cool her down with cold water or keep the thermostat in the house down low, she would be so much happier.  Her condition, anhidrosis, is rare, and little is well known about it.  Fortunately I found a support group online which made me realize I will have to do more research and let the doctors know what I want them to look for.  Our hope is to find out what is causing the condition.  We were sent to a dermatologist in Winston-Salem.  He was not helpful at all and was very rude.  He didn't listen to anything I had to say, and seemed to contradict the research I had done.  He did not feel her condition was sweat related at all.  I had found out about a sweat test that can be done, and after the other doctor talked to him, he thought that would be a good thing to pursue.  My doctor is wonderful, and when I came in with the information I had found, he was more than willing to do a referral. 

Here is the bottom line:  YOU KNOW YOUR CHILD BEST!   If someone tells you something that doesn't seem quite right, do some research, and advocate for your child.