New Baby and Sleep Deprivation

Q:  Hi Jennifer. I am a mommy to 4 children! My oldest just turned 6 and will start school in the fall, then my 4 year old, my 2 year old, and finally my newborn. I just had our fourth and last baby, and I am TIRED. This baby required a c-section and I am in a lot of pain. I am also up a lot with the baby and have no energy for my 3 other children. My family all lives across the country, so it's mainly me until my husband Mark gets home from work. I do pretty well, except for the lack of sleep thing! My question is: do you think it's OK for me to nap with the baby and allow my children to play in the house (never outside unless I'm there)? We have locks up high on all the doors to make sure they cannot unlock the doors themselves and go outside without us knowing. My kids play very well together. Do you have any other tips for taking care of little ones while also dealing with the pain of birth and severe sleep deprivation? Thank you so much! I am sure I will have other questions for you in the future!!!!!!!!!!!!

A:  Congratulations on your new little one!  I know it can be exhausting.  While I cannot relate to going through a C-Section, I got my youngest when she was 3 days old, and was going through some anxiety/panic attack problems that were leaving my energy supply depleted.  First of all, you know your children best, but I would be nervous leaving a 2-year old unsupervised.  My daughter gets in to so many things, that I would be nervous what would happen without supervision.  When I was really sick and alone with my daughter when she was young, I would go in her room (which was very baby-proof) and lay on the floor with a blanket.  She was able to play without getting into trouble, while I drifted off to sleep on the floor.  I was close enough by that I could hear if there was any trouble.  I would think with strict guidelines, your 4-year old and 6-year old could play in another room while you get a little bit of sleep.  I would also recommend having your husband be part of the night routine.  My husband and I would work it out so he would be up until midnight to cover any feedings, and I would take anything after that.  That way we both got some uninterrupted sleep.  If you are nursing, I would highly recommend introducing the bottle and pumping enough for your husband to take a shift.  You both have to take care of yourselves.  On the topic of sleep deprivation, I would definitely have a "rest time" for everyone.  Of course I know the baby is not necessarily on a schedule yet, but there should be some quiet time where everyone either naps or takes some books to read.  If your children are flexible, you could try to work it out so they are doing this at the same time your baby is sleeping.  Hope that gives you some useful information!  Just know it will get better; hang in there!